You know the old expression “That went down like a lead balloon”, well someone took that idea and ran with it. You send LeadBaloons.com a dollar and they will send you a rude balloon, or something like $12 for a pack of 13 Bastard balloons.
Choose from a number of happy messages like the above simple yet effective “Bastard”, or choose something a bit happier like “you are a waste of blood and organs”, or “another year closer to the sweet release of death”.
These are guaranteed to really liven up Grandma’s next birthday party. Or get you excommunicated from the family. Either way it should be a right laugh.