This Goomba Plush Toy is the cutest thing that has ever killed me, and in return, be killed by me. For a long time when I was a little girl playing Super Mario World I wondered about the Goombas. Were they forced to work for a tyrannical Bowser out of fear? Fear for themselves? Fear for their families? Or were they being somehow controlled by Bowser. Why would these simple creatures with no other method of attack or defence choose to throw their lives away at the drop of a hat? Consider the fact that the Goombas may have simply been creatures going about their daily lives only to be ambushed by a fat Mustachioed Italian dude. Is it possible that Mario was the evil one? Perhaps Peach was an evil Tyrant that forced Goombas into Concentration Camps and Mushroom Mines. Perhaps Bowser kidnapped her to set the Mushroom Kingdnom free. This would explain the Goomba’s utter devotion, their willingness to throw their lives away at the drop of a hat in an effort to stop the killer for hire that is intent on freeing the evil bitch Peach. Think about that next time you are playing a Mario game. Consider the untold amount of lives taken by Mario and his cronies in an effort to subjugate entire races and species. Or maybe I was just an odd child…

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